Super Thoughts!

Well, the thoughts probably aren't all that super, but the game was called Super, even if it wasn't all that super. Or something. Random thoughts on the Super Bowl:

:: I was rooting for the Colts, but not really rooting against the Saints -- it was one of those games where I wanted one team to win but wasn't bothered much that they didn't. It is always nice to see teams that have historically sucked finally manage to put their shit together and win the Super Bowl.

:: Note to Buffalo Bills: see? See?! Teams that have historically sucked -- even if for only ten years and not, well, forever, like the Saints did -- actually can manage to put their shit together and win the Super Bowl!

:: A Super Bowl ring doesn't make Gregg Williams less of an irritating ass. I predict he'll fall flat again once he gets another crack at head coaching.

:: Jim Nance and Phil Simms were kind of annoying, I thought. And hey, Mr. Nance? Just because Phil Simms has two Super Bowl rings doesn't mean that he won two Super Bowls.

:: Bill Cowher, before the game: "Nobody ever remembers who lost the Super Bowl." Oh. Well, I suppose that explains the quizzical looks I get when I tell people from Albuquerque that I'm a Bills fan.

:: I'm always amused by the Ritual Presentation of the Super Special Coin, the one they use for the opening coin toss. The head ref says something like "Gentlemen, I have here the special coin we are using. This side, featuring a portrait of Vince Lombardi in a gladiator's costume, is heads, while this side, featuring a picture of Joe Namath kissing Suzy Kolbert is tails." I think it would be funny if the ref pulled out, say, a Nevada quarter: "Gentlemen, we'll be flipping this Nevada quarter. This picture of some old dead white guy is heads, and on the other side? See the horsies? That's tails!"

:: More NFL pageantry goofiness: the Ritual Presentation of the Vince Lombardi Trophy, where some Elder Statesman of the Game walks the trophy across the field to the big stage where they're going to award it. That's bad enough, but what makes the whole thing so laughable is the pseudo-majestic fanfare they blast over the stadium speakers as the trophy is carried out. Hey, NFL, you're not placing the crown on the head of the new King of Gondor. It's a trophy.

:: OK, the game itself was...well, look, it had a result that everyone loved and it wasn't a blowout. But I gotta be honest: the game was boring. Really, it was just dullsville. For two weeks all we heard was that the Super Bowl might be the greatest offensive explosion in football history...and all we get is a standard 31-17 game in which the two biggest plays were a surprise onside kick and an interception return for a touchdown? No great offensive heroics, no big offensive plays -- just a whole lot of dink-and-dunk, a ten-yard completion here, a twelve-yard completion there, ho hum, lather rinse repeat.

:: Super Bowl narratives I'm glad I don't have to hear anymore: "Peyton Manning must win this game if he's to be known as the greatest quarterback EVER!" and "The Saints deserve to win this game because of Hurricane Katrina!" Look: quarterback greatness isn't necessarily determined by the number of rings he has, and as nice as the Saints' win is, it doesn't rebuild anything in New Orleans. It's a football game.

:: I'm long on record as not really caring about Super Bowl commercials, so as usual I didn't see a lot of them because I simply wasn't paying attention. I suppose the best was the Google one, which I watched online this morning. A couple of the Doritos ones made me laugh. None of the movie trailers looked interesting (Robin Hood maybe, but the trailer made it look like what it probably is -- a grim and violent medieval epic by Ridley Scott). And aren't we about done with the various farm animals who bond with or somehow want to be around the Budweiser Clydesdales? Can't they find a new way to feature those horses? I say they go for high weirdness next year. I wanna see the Budweiser Clydesdales have a precious and twee relationship with a giant squid! How cool would that be!

And maybe this is curmudgeonly of me, but I just can't count myself among the apparent masses in this country who think things are automatically awesome if Betty White is somehow involved. Betty White getting tackled into the mud did nothing for me. Abe Vigoda, on the other hand -- that's comedy gold!

:: God in Heaven, the halftime show was painful. I like the Who as much as anyone, but Ye Gods, this was just awful.

:: During pregame, they had Queen Latifah sing America the Beautiful immediately before Carrie Underwood sang The Star-Spangled Banner. Underwood's performance wasn't that great, but Latifah's was very nice, and it reinforced my belief that America the Beautiful should really be our anthem.

:: I read a little while ago that Peyton Manning exited the field immediately after the Colts' last possession ended, even though it then fell to New Orleans to run out the clock. So Manning is the newest entry in the "losers skipping the handshakes after the game" thing that's becoming more and more common. Peyton, it was jerky for Tom Brady and Bill Belichick to do it when you beat them four years ago, and it was jerky for you to do it when you lost yesterday. When you lose, man up and shake the hand of them that beat you. You did it in fourth grade peewee football, I'm sure you can handle it now.

:: I saw the Tim Tebow ad, and I note that today, everybody's saying "Awww, shucks! It was a nice ad!" Sure, I suppose, given that it was designed to give a nice happy sheen to a grouped that's anti-gay and in favor of forced pregnancy. And the question still remains as to why CBS would air their ad, but insist that they don't do issue ads when the position being taken in the ad is a liberal one.

That's about it. Another NFL season in the books. Next up, the Draft. Wheeeee!