2020: [sigh of not really relief, but not defeat either]

 It's time for my annual wrap-up quiz. Warning: I'm writing about 2020 here. Trigger warnings galore! And some political bluntness, for which I'll say, if you disagree with me, well...I do not care. For a taste of how I've been seeing the year just gone by, consider this tweet:

A lot of folks acting as if 2020 has just been a string of bewildering bad luck, rather than what it truly is: a concentration of widely and reliably predicted and interconnected disasters that advanced nations of the world could have mitigated or prevented but chose not to.

— Kane Wishart (@kanewishart) September 11, 2020

It's been my view for some time that everything going wrong for America and for the world, all of it, consists of self-inflicted wounds, and I have seen nothing to make me think otherwise for even a second.

But now, on to the quiz.

Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? 

 My resolutions never change much: "Read a lot, write a lot, eat healthier, walk more, listen to more music." As these go, not bad! The toughest one is "eat healthier," which is a back-end kind of thing: I have no problem finding newer healthier foods to like. It's staying away from the less-than-healthy ones that tends to trip me up! This is something I need to work on big-time. As for the rest, it was a decent year. I wrote a fair amount (though a lot of my writing time this year was spent on editing existing manuscripts, so drafting was on the backseat for a chunk of the year). Reading was a constant, and I really have made effort to listen to more music! 

  Did anyone close to you give birth? 

 Nope. 

  Did anyone close to you die? 

 I suppose it's almost miraculous that in the Year of COVID, my answer to this is, No. But I know of people who have died, and people close who have suffered a lot of loss (and not all of it COVID driven, since the rest of Death didn't exactly go on holiday because of the pandemic). 

  What countries did you visit? 

 In my mind? Tons. 

  What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020? 

 A Federal government that isn't led by a delusional authoritarian grifter whose appeal is distressingly wide. 

  What was your biggest achievement of the year? 

 It was 2020. I got to the end of it without having contracted COVID-19 as of this writing. This was not a year for grand accomplishments, I suspect...though I did get a book ready for release, and more! Detail to come in another post. 

  What was your biggest failure? 

 I took entirely too much random delight in chucking rocks at online trolls. 

  What was the best thing you bought? 

 I probably bought way too much stuff this year--adding to the overalls collection and purchasing books, of course--but the thing that's brought the most direct happiness to my ongoing existence is the pair of Bluetooth ear buds I picked up in June. I had watched a YouTube video that was randomly recommended by that platform's algorithm (why, I'm not sure, it was just someone's "day in the life" video diary thing), in which a person put on earbuds that had hooks to go over the ear, and I thought, "Wait, they make those?" A bit of Googling turned up my Soundcore buds. 

  Whose behavior merited celebration? 

 Anyone who wore a mask and socially-distanced themselves, no matter how hard it may have been to do so. 

  Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Not even my skills with the English language can convey my disappointment at how much farther the Republicans can descend in this country. As I write this, a bunch of them in Congress are gearing up to "object" to the certification of the Electoral College results, based on zero concrete evidence of any "fraud" whatsoever. It's pure banana-republic dictator shit, this business of "We respect the election as long as the guy in charge wins" and it's just appalling. Add to that the QAnon lunatics, the science deniers, and the ones who refuse to wear masks or maintain social distance because of "FREEDOM!", and you've got a deeply dangerous state of affairs in this country. We can't long survive this large a percentage of our citizenry being completely off its collective rocker. I'm also disappointed in what I see as America's rejection of collective thinking and its growing lack of imagination, but that will have to wait for another post. 

  Where did most of your money go? 

 Books, booze, food, gifts, and vintage overalls. And I paid down some debt, which was nice. 

  What did you get really excited about? 

 In 2020? Day trips to Ithaca and Letchworth and the Finger Lakes area. New flavors I've tried. I've made green tea a part of my daily routine of late, and I'm loving it! (I also discovered just this week, when the last of my Christmas gifts came in the mail, just how much tea is in a pound of the stuff. Note to self: order the stuff 8oz at a time, moving forward.)

  Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?

Oh, who the hell knows. On a personal level I'm pretty happy and doing fine. When I start thinking societally, though--ugh. On a political note, I'm really increasingly disappointed by my country. Maybe I'll write more about this later, but re-electing the Joni Ernst's and the Susan Collinses and the Mitch McConnells of the world is a staggering failure of citizenship, and the fact that more than 70 million of my fellow Americans looked at the current state of affairs and decided that they were fine with it is horribly depressing. 

  Thinner or fatter? 

 A bit thinner! No idea about the poundage, but I own overalls for which I have never been able to fasten both sets of side buttons--and now I can. This amazes me. Now, my progress in that regard has probably taken a small beating the last few weeks, but I did develop some healthier eating habits in 2020 that won't be hard to replicate. I can still do the "gluttony" thing on occasion, but I've finally reached a point where doing so is fun for a very short while, but then my brain goes, "Oooog, gimme salad and fiber and lean protein, please."

  Richer or poorer? 

 I'm doing better than a lot of Americans. And we all should be doing better, shouldn't we? I really hope I live long enough to see this country finally start to pivot away from the trickle-down, "If we just let rich people have more and more money they'll eventually rain it down upon us all" bullshit that's been the economic wind in America's wings since 1981.

I'll say this for American conservatism: when it managed to convince most of America that the major factor holding them back was what government was taking out of their paychecks instead of what their employers were never putting in their paychecks in the first place, it won a rhetorical victory for the ages. 

  What do you wish you'd done more of? 

 As always, reading, writing, and walking. (Same as last year.) 

  What do you wish you'd done less of? 

 Chucking rocks at right-wing trolls online. Yeah, it's fun to mute them and watch them reply anyway, but still...it's not a terribly productive use of time! 

  How did you spend Christmas? With family. We used FaceTime to include my sister, which was...well, obviously it's not the same, but it was actually a fun way to manage to include someone who wasn't able to be around due to circumstances and shit. Other than that, Christmas was what it always is for us: a quiet time spent with family. I don't come from a large and close extended family, and The Wife's family lives far away as well, so Christmas has never been about large gatherings and traveling around to multiple houses to put in appearances. It's always been about home, and I expect it always will be. I hear people complaining about how their holidays were ruined by COVID, or how they were going to defy the Big Bad Government to go to their giant get-togethers, and I reflect anew on the degree to which this particular crisis has forced an awful lot of Americans into my lifestyle. I haven't yet figured out to what degree their reactions to this amuses me or depresses me, but it's definitely some of both. 

  Did you fall in love in 2020? 

 She's from the Niagara Falls area, you don't know her. 

(Yes, that's a quote from The Breakfast Club.)

  How many one-night stands? 

 Come on. I never had one-night stands when they were an option. 

  What was your favorite TV program? 

 ABC canceled Bless This Mess, which was a hilarious fish-outta-water sitcom about two NYC liberal hippie-types who inherit farmland in Nebraska, so eff you, ABC. (The show was not about "Let's make fun of the hicks!", if you're thinking along those lines. It was a collection of zany weirdos and full of character-driven comedy that was some of the funniest stuff I've seen in years. If you watch it, the short first season--only six episodes, if I recall correctly--is mildly amusing, but the show didn't take off creatively until the second season, which was sadly the last.)

ABC also had a cool detective show called Stumptown, set in Portland, OR, that I liked a lot. They renewed it for a second season...and then when COVID shut down production, they ended up canceling it instead. Curse you, ABC!

CBS has a sitcom called The Unicorn which we like a lot. This follows a widower as he starts to emerge from grieving; he has two teenage daughters and a wonderful support system of friends around him. This show is in its second season and is worth checking out. It's sometimes bittersweet, but it's never depressing.

Oh, and we like The Mandalorian a great deal. We're slowly watching Season Two now, rationing it out for maximum enjoyment. Of course, the Internet has already seen to it that I'm spoiled and know what happens at the end, so thanks, Internet. Sheesh. 

  Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? 

 I really don't like hatred and I try to avoid it. 

  What was the best book you read? 

 I refer you to my Books Read in 2020 post from the other day, where my five-star reads are highlighted in bold. 

  What was your greatest musical discovery? 

 Oh, music! Music might have saved me this year, to the point where this blog was almost exclusively a music blog for a whole lot of the time. Aside from my year-long deep dive into Beethoven, I also did a lot of listening to the work of Black composers, which often featured in my semi-regular Tone Poem Tuesday posts. This was a partial response on my part to the Black Lives Matter movement, because surely one way we can start to acknowledge the importance of the Black lives that we whites have for so long completely marginalized and ignored is to engage with Black art. This will remain a focus of mine, moving forward. As far as specific Black composers go, I've really become a fan of Florence Price, whose music I featured several times.

Non-classical? Well, none of these were "discoveries", but I'm discovering a real fondness for ELO, which I am starting to consider one of the most underrated bands in history, and Taylor Swift, whom I am starting to consider simply a genius.

  What did you want and get? 

 President-elect Joe Biden. 

  What did you want and not get? 

 A United States Senate not ruled by Mitch McConnell, whom I believe to be the single worst American of my lifetime. (Though, if Georgia voters manage to come through, I still may get this.) 

  What were your favorite films of this year? 

 2020 was the first year of my life that I never set foot in a movie theater, and I only watched a single movie new to me, courtesy of Netflix. That was Enola Holmes, which I enjoyed greatly. I love film and I wish I had more time to watch them. I suspect my retirement, when it finally comes, is going to be a big film-fest. 

  What did you do on your birthday? 

 I don't remember specifically what happened on my birthday, but my sister was in town and we did some antiquing and visiting comics stores. The next week was our annual trip to Ithaca and the Finger Lakes, which took on a very different tone given that the annual Apple Harvest Festival was canceled due to COVID. 

  How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2019? 

 It's a struggle, every morning: "Which shirt do I want to wear with which overalls?" 

  What kept you sane?

Books and music and dogs and cats and overalls. Walks in the woods and by the water. I cope best when I'm allowed to focus my energies inward. 

  Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I'll give a shout-out to author and podcaster Dana Schwartz, who is a fine writer and the host of the wonderful podcast Noble Blood, which focuses on the sordid and grim side of history. There have been episodes on each one of Henry VIII's wives (not all of whom were beheaded!), and a particularly effective episode about King Leopold II of Belgium and how he spearheaded some of the bloodiest acts of African colonialism. My favorite episode focused on one of my favorite stories from the history of science, the life of Tycho Brahe. Schwartz focuses that episode on Brahe's life, instead of coming at it from the standpoint of Johannes Kepler, as most commentators do.

  What political issue stirred you the most? 

 God, so many to choose from...but Black Lives Matter remains staggering to me. That a cop could just casually kneel with his knee on the throat of a black man until he died is one of the most appalling things I've ever seen, closely followed by the ability of so many white people to argue that there was really nothing at all wrong with this.

And there's also my country's response to COVID-19, a response so perfect in its malignant incompetence and rejection of science that it truly makes me believe that whatever greatness lies in store for humanity, America will no longer be much of a factor in driving it. 

  Who did you miss?

The geeky people who frequent the local cons! I was just starting to get comfortable with the idea of hanging out at local conventions and trying to market myself there (I was even going to release Book Four of The Song of Forgotten Stars at Nickel City Con in May), but that's gone. I miss festivals--Ithaca's Apple Harvest Festival, the Sterling Renaissance Festival, various others that we like to frequent. I miss some favorite local restaurants that we pray manage to hold on long enough for the vaccine to finally start beating back this virus. 

  Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020: 

 The same ones as always: Read a lot, write a lot. Listen to music. Go for walks and look at sunsets. Take all the pictures you want. Learn new things and try new stuff. If you have a dog, take him for walks. Buy books for your daughter, even when she complains that she likes to pick her own books (let her do that, too). Nothing fits your hand so well as your lover’s hand. Eating out is fine, but learn to cook things, too. Have a place to go where they know you and what you order. Don’t be afraid to revisit your childhood passions now and again; you weren’t always wrong back then. Overalls are awesome, it’s OK to wear double denim, and a pie in the face is a wonderful thing!

To all of this I would add something that wasn't really a lesson I learned in 2020, but which I saw illustrated in events so stark as to have it all be writ large in the fiery letters in the sky: The United States of America desperately needs to re-embrace rational and collective thinking, and ditch its mythologies about rugged individualism and the eternal wisdom of "the Founders". I'd sum it up with a quote from the afore-mentioned Enola Holmes: "Our future is up to us." 

  If you take selfies, post your six favorite ones: 

Yeah, I'm doing eight, because I can.

  Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

Boy, have I been dreading this question. A song that sums up 2020? How could there possibly be a musical expression of how this awful year was and the effect it had...but maybe, just maybe, 2020 was sufficiently calamitous to provoke at least a beginning to a long-needed reassessment of the American paradigm of life, business, and profit?

This made me remember the last episode of House MD, which ended as Dr. House, having faked his own death, took off on a motorcycle trip with his best friend Dr. Wilson, who at this point was dying of cancer and had only months left. As they motor off into the hills, this song played out the end of the show, and if this is a bit morbid (and maybe sexist in one verse), well...these are the times in which we live.

So here's Guy Lombardo.

You work and work for years and years, you're always on the go
You never take a minute off, too busy makin' dough
Someday you say, you'll have your fun, when you're a millionaire
Imagine all the fun you'll have in your old rockin' chair

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think
Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink
The years go by, as quickly as a wink
Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it's later than you think

You're gonna take that ocean trip, no matter come what may
You've got your reservations made, but you just can't get away
Next year for sure, you'll see the world, you'll really get around
But how far can you travel when you're six feet underground?

Your heart of hearts, your dream of dreams, your ravishing brunette
She's left you and she's now become somebody else's pet
Lay down that gun, don't try my friend to reach the great beyond
You'll have more fun by reaching for a redhead or a blond

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think
Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink
The years go by, as quickly as a wink
Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it's later than you think

You never go to night clubs and you just don't care to dance
You don't have time for silly things like moonlight and romance
You only think of dollar bills tied neatly in a stack
But when you kiss a dollar bill, it doesn't kiss you back

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think
Enjoy yourself, while you're still in the pink
The years go by, as quickly as a wink
Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it's later than you think

Let's make 2021 better, shall we? I'd love to be able to post some optimistic and more cheerful answers to these questions in one year's time. Remember Ms. Holmes's quote above: Our future is up to us.

An A-to-Z Thing

I saw this at Ken Levine's blog, so I thought I'd do it quickly.

And by the way, I told a bunch of people that I'd be doing some much-belated Ask Me Anything answers last week, but that was before last week turned into the Bataan Death March combined with the final flight of the Hindenberg, so...hopefully this week. In the future, by the way, I'll eschew Ask Me Anything! if it coincides with me trying to get through the meaty part of a book. I don't want to leave people dangling quite the way I have, both this year and last (when February saw us starting preparations for moving).

And now, the A-Z thing.

• A-Available/Single? “Hey dear? Am I single and available? I’m sorry, what? But it’s not my turn to do the dishes and clean the litterboxes! OK, fine....”

• B-Best Friend? Aside from The Wife? Probably this one dude who is one of my beta-readers and is the source of whatever insight I have on the game of hockey.

• C-Cake or Pie? Pie. But then, I’ve never been hit in the face with a cake, so maybe I’m missing something amazing.

• D-Drink Of Choice? Rum. Or Scotch. Or bourbon. Or beer. I also like water.

• E-Essential Item You Use Everyday? My phone, tablet, and laptop. Love the electronics. They make my life better!

• F-Favorite Color? Purple! But I honestly don’t dislike any colors.

• G-Gummy Bears Or Worms? Ewwww. I don’t like Gummi stuff.

• H-Hometown? Orchard Park, NY.

• I-Indulgence? There are these white-chocolate and toffee chip cookies at The Store that make me weep.

• January Or February? February. The Wife’s birthday, the Super Bowl, and spring training starts.

• K-Kids & Their Names? The Kid. Singular.

• L-Life Is Incomplete Without? Love.

• M-Marriage Date? May 17.

• N-Number Of Siblings? 1

• O-Oranges Or Apples? Apples. I enjoy oranges, but apples are so versatile and amazing!

• P-Phobias/Fears? Clowns tend to freak me out. Dogs, too. I like our dog, but I remain deeply suspicious of other dogs.

• Q-Favorite Quote? “I love you!” “I know.”

• R-Reason to Smile? Overalls and coffee for a Saturday morning writing session.

• S-Season? Fall.

• T-Tag Three or Four People? OK, you’re all it.

• U-Unknown Fact About Me? I cannot roll my R’s.

• V-Vegetable you don't like? Broccoli. That shit can go extinct, for all I care.

• W-Worst Habit? Swearing a lot, eating too many sweets.

• X-X-rays You've Had? My collarbone, when some shitty kid pushed me off my bike years ago and broke it.

• Y-Your Favorite Food? Pizza. Or burgers. Or ice cream. Or jambalaya. Or spanish rice. Or fried fish. Or....

• Z-Zodiac Sign? Libra.

Nothing terribly interesting there, I guess!

A quiz-thing, huzzah!

I don't do as many quiz-things as I used to. So here's a quiz-thing, stolen from Cal.

1: What eye color do you find sexiest?

Blue, I guess. Never really thought of it before.

2: White, milk, or dark chocolate mocha?

No idea. Not off to a promising start here....

3: If you could get a Sharpie tattoo on your back, what would it be?

Label where my internal organs are.

4: Did you grow up in a small or big town? Did you like it?

Small town. I liked it well enough, but even then it was slowly dying away, and while the area is physically beautiful, there's really nothing there now. At the time I didn't really understand "the rules" of interacting in a small town, so I got bullied a lot. To this day I'm unsure as to how much I liked it, but I did enjoy the people a good deal, despite not having a hell of a lot in common with any of them.

5: Your favorite adult as a child? (and not your parents, if they were your favorite)

Huh. Probably any teachers who took active interest in whatever talents I had. Regrettably, these were more infrequent than they should have been.

6: What kind of smoothie sounds really good right now?

Blueberry. I love me some blueberries. Or pomegranate. Or orange-vanilla. Or...anything but banana, peach, or mango. I don't like those flavors in things, even though I love the respective fruits. What can I say, I'm strange.

7: Most embarrassing moment from your elementary school years?

Well, when you're the kid who tends to get bullied a bit and you make the mistake of writing on the cover of your notebook that you like some girl and one of the bullies finds the notebook...yeah, that's kinda mortifying.

8: Most embarrassing moment from your middle school years?

Writing a brief love-note to the girl I was crushing on turned out to be a less than good idea. She let me down gently, though. Good on her!

9: Most embarrassing moment from your high school years?

Don't worry, it didn't involve girls. I think. I actually mostly managed to get through high school with a minimum of embarrassing stuff happening.

10: Pirates or ninjas? Why?

Pirates. There are lots of cool, notorious pirates, and they drink lots of rum and get lots of wenches. Ninjas? They wear masks and anonymously dish out death as part of a collective.

11: Have you ever climbed a tree more than twenty feet off the ground?

Yes! Tree climbing is fun. I'd be great in the Amazon rain forest.

12: Did you like swinging as a child? Do you still get excited when you see a swing set?

Oh yeah, I loved swinging. In fact, it's still fun, if the swing is big enough.

One time I'm swinging away, nice and high, and some toddler wanders right into my path. I managed to jump off while holding on, dragging my feet and knees and generally hurting all manner of body parts -- and the little shit's mother comes over to get him and gives me a dirty look for almost hurting her precious little angel. Stupid woman.

13: If you could have any pet in the world, illegal or not, what would you get?

A Persian kitten. No, two Persian kittens. Because Persian kittens are so adorable that it makes me cry.

14: What’s your most favorite part of your body?

Is Jadzia Dax would say of Leonard McCoy, "He had the hands of a surgeon...."

15: What’s your most favorite part of your personality?

My increasingly-strong ability to not give a crap.

16: Madonna or Lady Gaga? Neither? Both? Who cares?

Madonna, although I do think Gaga is cut from the same cloth. I still think Madonna can bring it -- her Super Bowl halftime show was one of the greatest things I've seen in years, for sheer gonzo lunatic spectacle.

17: Have you ever watched the Superbowl all the way through?

Every year since SB XXIII (SF 20, Cincinnati 16), except for: SB XXIV (at college, busy that night, everybody knew SF would clobber Denver), SB XXXV (Baltimore beats crap out of Giants, dull game, missed second half driving home from party), SB XXXVIII (again, driving home from party), SB XLV (again, driving home from party). Most times when we've gone to Super Bowl parties, they've been really far away, and it takes a big chunk of the second half getting home.

18: Have you ever watched any major sporting event drunk?

No.

19: What’s the most delicious food you’ve ever eaten in your life?

I'll say something different each time you ask this, so for right now, I'll say...my mother's turkey dinner.

20: Margarine or butter? Which did you grow up with?

Now, butter. I don't recall what we used when I was a kid. I think that margarine is pretty awful stuff, though.

21: Whole, skim, 1%, or 2% milk? (Did you know they make 1 1/2% milk?)

Skim, although I'll use others for recipes, depending on what's called for. I prefer whole or half-and-half for creamy soups.

22: Which continents have you been on?

North America. Travel has not been in the cards for me much to now, aside from the States and Toronto.

23: Do you get motion sickness? Any horror stories?

Not really, but I'm chicken about inverting roller coasters. I want no part of those.

24: Backpacks or satchels?

Satchels, unless I'm walking through the wilderness. Then a backpack.

25: Would you wear a rainbow jacket? A neon yellow sweater? Checkered pants?

No on all three counts, but I'd be most likely to do the neon yellow sweater.

26: What was your favorite cartoon growing up?

Bugs Bunny and company.

27: If you had to have a cow or a pig, which would you take? Why?

The pig, because of bacon.

28: If you had to look at one city skyline for the rest of your life, which would it be?

Toronto's. I love that city! (Close seconds: NYC and Chicago.)

29: Longest plane ride you’ve ever been on?

Boston to Phoenix, as part of our journey across the country for my mother-in-law's funeral. It took 6.5 hours. I'm better equipped for such a flight now; I'd load up my tablet with a movie or two and watch away. I did have my laptop, but I could barely get it opened in those tiny seats.

30: The latest you’ve ever slept?

Noon, once or twice in college following an almost all-nighter. (I never once pulled an actual all-nighter, although one night we went to bed at 5:30 am.)

31: Would you buy a sweater covered in kitten pictures? Would you wear it if someone gave it you for free?

As much as I love kitties...probably not. Unless I wore it under overalls, which would conceal some of it.

32: Do you pick at scabs?

Ewwww! No! (But when I was a kid...yeah.)

33: Favorite kind of bean? Kidney? Black? Pinto?

I love beans of nearly every variety. I honestly couldn't pick a favorite.

34: How far can you throw a baseball?

Ugh! I suck at throwing. Never practiced as a kid.

35: If you had to move to another country, where would you move?

Toronto, ON, CA.

36: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? Vietnamese? Korean? Nepalese? How was it?

No, yes, no, no. I'd love to, though. I wish more ethnic restaurants weren't all in the farther-from-home 'burbs of Buffalo.

37: Small, liberal arts school or public university? Why?

I went to a small liberal arts school, but I think I'd have been fine in a larger place, too. I love the collegiate atmosphere, actually.

38: A relationship with love or one with sex?

Love. Without it, the other thing is pointless. Fun, I imagine, but pointless.

39: Do you eat enough vegetables?

No, but I'm getting better at it.

40: Do you like horror movies? How about thrillers?

Horror, no. Too often they're about shock and gore. Thrillers, absolutely! Some of my favorite movies are thrillers. Silence of the Lambs, for example.

41: Would you scratch a crotch itch in public?

Erm....

42: Do you swear in front of your parents?

I try not to, because it feels kinda odd, to this day.

43: Coolest thing you’ve ever been for Halloween?

Captain Marvel. Zap! Pow! (My mother made that costume, and it was awesome.)

44: If you could change your natural hair color, would you? To what?

I'd let it go. I'll be a Gandalf-like gray within five to ten years.

45: Do you want to get married? Have kids?

No, because to do that, I'd have to divest myself of the current marriage, and I don't have a whole lot of desire to do that.

46: Do you use a reusable water bottle? If not, you should.

Yes. Weird question.

47: City or nature person?

I think I'm a city person with a nature person looking to get out. Or maybe the other way around. I could be a nature person as long as I'm within, say, 45 minutes of a city.

48: Have you ever used something other than “makeup” as makeup? (Like paint? Markers?)

Unless whipped cream and coconut custard count, no.

49: Can you walk well in high heels? Even if you’re a guy?

Never tried. Heels do look nice on women, but I don't think they're likely worth the hassle and pain. I don't think they elevate a woman's appearance so much that I'd miss them if every woman just said "Oh, frak these things" and shuffled them off to the dustbin of history, like powdered wigs.

One thing I see fairly regularly is women wearing heels who clearly don't wear them very often. There's no mistaking that particular awkward gait.

50: Post 5 awesome things about yourself. BRAG AWAY!

I write well. I love to learn new things. I can cook. I'm good with cats. And I'm ready to step in and take over writing chores for Star Wars Episode VII on a moment's notice!

2012: The Trek Continues

It’s time for the annual quiz! Because I do this quiz every year as the last post of the year. That’s what makes it annual! In general, 2012 was a kind of promising year. I feel good about the seeds I sowed this year; now hopefully in 2013, I will be able to do some reaping.

The next post below this one is my yearly navel-gazing in which I link all that stuff of mine online that I particularly like: photos, blog posts, and specific posts about books and movies.

Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Aside from the usual -- read more, write more, continue eating ever healthier, and so on -- not really. As for last year’s? Well, I did read and write a lot, and I did continue eating healthier, and I did lose weight. So yay, me!

I also screwed up on one ‘resolution’ -- I signed up for a blogging ‘challenge’, centered on reading literary classics. And I had my list of books picked out. And I read one of them. And then I promptly got distracted by The Shiny and forgot the entire thing. Oops!

Did anyone close to you give birth?

No, but I have some friends who are going to in the next few months, so a healthy Mazel tov! to them!

Did anyone close to you die?

Luckily...no. I’m keenly aware that the likelihood of continuing to dodge that bullet will continue to drop every single year now, but we have suffered no major visits from The Reaper since my mother-in-law’s passing.

What countries did you visit?

We went back to Canada! First time since 2006 that we were able to enjoy that country’s wonderments. (Or, at least the wonderments in Toronto.) We can’t wait to go back!

Other than that, all the usual fictional countries that I visited in movies or in the books. In a lot of ways, that’s the best kind of traveling.

What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?

My usual answer: A book on my shelf, a real book, printed by a publisher and everything, that I wrote. Good news is that I think I’m heading in that direction. I really really really hope I am. I don’t like to count chickens before they’re omelets, or whatever that expression is, but I have a sense that with Princesses In SPACE!!! (not the actual title), I’m on to something in a way that I’ve never been before, writing-wise.

I’d also like a more definitive sense that my country is moving in a direction that I wish. It’s hard being liberal in this country.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

It’s all writing, baby! Writing, all writing. I got the first draft of Princesses done, then I let it lay fallow, and then I got through one round of edits before handing it off to an able group of beta-readers. Now I’m putting together my final draft (until a professional editor requests/suggests alterations, should I be fortunate enough to get that far). This was a big deal for me -- the first major completion of a writing project in quite a while.

I also did a NaNoWriMo project, which I ‘completed’ in the sense of generating 50,000 words in November. The story itself still isn’t done -- I back-burnered that one while I’m doing edits on Princesses -- but I know where it’s going, and will get back to it as soon as the more pressing work is done.

And it’s always nice to go to a doctor’s visit for a 6-month follow-up and have her be impressed across the board with everything.

What was your biggest failure?

Probably the afore-mentioned ‘Classics reading challenge’. I mean, I completely forgot about it. Remembered in September. Ugh! I feel pretty dumb about that one.

I also started a novel, a fantasy book not actually titled The Adventures of Lighthouse Boy!, but I had to shelve that one temporarily because the story just wasn’t unfolding very convincingly. I need to rethink that one a bit. (And that will bring up some decision-making, as the sequel to Princesses is now gestating in my head!)

What was the best thing you bought?

A new laptop (Dell Inspiron), a tablet (7-inch Samsung Galaxy II), two pairs of Carhartt overalls, a retro-rocket ship and a UFO-with-alien Christmas tree ornament, some books, and so on.

Whose behavior merited celebration?

The Wife, The Daughter, and generally lots of folks!

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

God, I wish the Republican Party would come back to the land of the sane. I’ve been thinking a bit lately about President George HW Bush, who has been sick of late. I didn’t agree with him politically, and I think that he does bear some responsibility for the Republican party’s trip into the cesspool (his winning campaign in 1988 was pretty nauseating), but he was also the last Republican of national standing who didn’t make me feel like throwing up.

Where did most of your money go?

Food, bills, books. Same as most years!

What did you get really excited about?

Finishing drafts of Princesses, voting for Barack Obama a second time, and finally seeing Les Miserables on the stage. (Yes, I’ll see the movie. Not sure when, but I will see it!)

What song will always remind you of 2012?

It’s interesting about ‘viral’ videos: I watch ‘em like everybody, out of curiosity, and then I usually don’t watch them again. This one, however, I still watch a couple of times a month, because the sheer happiness of the thing, the fact that this fellow rounded up that many folks to help out with his little proposal project, and the fact that the song he used is just great, in that ear-worming pop-tune kind of way. It’s Bruno Mars’s “Marry You”, used in the now-famous ‘Live-Dub’ Proposal:


Boy Howdy, I love that! It’s things like this which make me think that maybe, just maybe, no matter how bad things get on the ‘macro’ level, we humans have a chance to get our shit together.

Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?

Happier. Indisputably happier -- and that’s a trend that’s been ongoing for a while now.

Thinner or fatter?

Thinner! Again, not by a whole lot, but I remain convinced that slow and steady is the way to go when it comes to weight loss. (Admittedly, the last month has not been helpful in this regard, but January is coming!)

Richer or poorer?

Not so much richer, but I continue to be a better steward of what I have and plan to continue to be that. Plus, when Princesses achieves renown as the science fiction equivalent of Harry Potter, well then--! (Yeah, now I’m really getting ahead of myself!)

What do you wish you'd done more of?

Reading and writing, of course.

What do you wish you'd done less of?

Bitching about politics (which is something I already don’t do much of to begin with). Noodling about online. (“Hmmmm, I could use a break! I’m gonna watch some West Wing clips on YouTube.” [90 minutes later] “Huh, I should really do some work....”)

How did you spend Christmas?

We’re always low-key on Christmas: family at home, eating, playing games, eating some more, watching stuff, maybe drinking a bit of rum. Visiting Little Quinn at the cemetery, and then stopping at 7-11 for BigGulps.

Did you fall in love in 2012?

My stock answer applies: I fall in love on a daily basis!

How many one-night stands?

Zero. I’m taken, as always! (Unless the salacious dreams I occasionally have about Stana Katic and Kat Dennings count...in which case...uh....)

What was your favorite TV program?

Castle, Battlestar Galactica, Firefly, Big Bang Theory, 2 Broke Girls, Mentalist, and the new biggie, Person of Interest. Oh, and Once Upon a Time.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

I don’t hate. Well, sometimes I do, but I catch myself and try to stop as quickly as possible.

What was the best book you read?

In fiction, probably Sacre Bleu! by Christopher Moore. In non-fiction, Space Chronicles by Neil DeGrasse Tyson, and the remarkable The Long Walk, by Buffalo author Brian Castner. Amazing books, all of them!

What was your greatest musical discovery?

Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors. See below!

What did you want and get?

Closer to a finished book. New tech toys. The re-election of the President. Carhartt overalls. A smaller body. Pies in my face.

What did you want and not get?

Even closer to a finished book than I am now. A sane opposition party that acknowledges science and reality and doesn’t base its every action on opposing whatever the President wants. Some power tools that I’ve had my eye on, but not purchased yet. Forest green Carhartt overalls -- they don’t make them anymore, so I have to keep an eye out on eBay for a pair my size. (When I do, they will be mine. Oh yes, they WILL be mine.) And, as it only happened the one time...pies in my face!

What were your favorite films of this year?

Of movies that came out this year, Skyfall and The Hobbit rocked my world pretty soundly. Of movies I saw that didn’t come out this year? I really liked Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist and Inglourious Basterds.

What did you do on your birthday?

On my actual birthday? I worked. We celebrated a few days later with our annual trip to Ithaca for their Apple Harvest Festival; we ate at PF Changs in Rochester, had waffles and fried chicken at Waffle Frolic in Ithaca, and at Chipotle Mexican Grill for the first time; we shopped for arts and crafts and books at some of the fine bookstores down there. And then a day or two later, the annual pies in my face.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?

Heh! Same as always: utilitarian to the max, dominated by bib overalls. As noted, I did finally get on board with the Carhartt brand, and now I love ‘em to death. I bought a new fleece sweater, too. As usual, though: the hippie-in-workwear.

What kept you sane?

Same reply as last year: Laughing; reading; writing; discovering that even though we've been together in one way or another for almost twenty twenty-one years, I still have ways of getting to know The Wife; singing loudly in the car when I'm by myself; torturing The Daughter with awful puns (something my father did to me, coincidentally enough!); geeking out to Star Wars and Lord of the Rings; getting hit in the face with pies. It's awfully hard to take yourself seriously when crust, custard, and whipped cream are dripping from your face.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Oh, the usual ones! But now that Castle is letting Detective Beckett actually be happy...oh my, Stana Katic!

Seeing as how I had no idea who she was a year ago? Adele. She’s awesome.

Outpacing her, though, is my growing admiration for Michelle Obama. She’s just an amazing woman. Our President is a fortunate man.

What political issue stirred you the most?

It was an election year, so there were a whole lot of them. But of late...my general distaste for guns has crystallized into hatred for the damn things.

Who did you miss?

I miss Dr. House. I hope he’s finding a way to solve medical mysteries and call people stupid while he tools around the country with Wilson.

Who was the best new person you met?

Just about all were folks online; I continue to meet more folks online each year, more now on Twitter and Facebook than in Blogistan, but it’s still cool. There are a lot of smart people in the world!

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012:

WRITE. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

READ. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

And keeping the ones from years past: We learn by screwing up, so embrace your inner FAIL! The Internet is made of people. Never, ever punt. (You know, I’m serious about that one. F*** punting. Always go for it. Even if it’s 4th and 30. From your own 2.) Democracy works wonders, but it works them eventually. Not all tears are an evil. Whipped cream is a miracle substance. So is ice cream.

Use your local library! Limiting your reading to only those books you can afford to buy is madness. OpenOffice rules. Buy good tools, take care of them, don't lend them out, and they'll last forever. Pie is wonderful stuff, whether on your plate or in your face. Screw fashion; if it's comfy, wear it. We're not meant to be alone. No object fits in your hand so perfectly as your wife's hand, and no object fits so perfectly on your shoulder as your child's head. Let it be, and all you need is love.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

I heard this song way back in May in, of all places, FOX’s ads for the series finale of House MD. It’s just a wonderful song, and I love its moving sound, its sense of pleading optimism, and its general sense of inspiration. It’s “Live Forever”, by Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors.



Laughter is the only thing
that’ll keep you sane,
In this world there’s cryin’
more and more every day.

Don’t let evil
get you down,
in this madness
spinning round and round!

I want you to live forever,
underneath the sky so blue!

Some people say faith
is a childish game.
Play on, children,
like it’s Christmas Day!

Sing me a song!
Sing me a melody!
Sing out loud--
You’re a symphony!

I want you to live forever,
underneath the sky so blue!
I want you to live forever,
underneath the sky so blue!
So that’s 2012. Onward to 2013!

And as always, in a 'last but most certainly not least' vein, I'd like to thank all you fine, wonderful readers for dropping by this year, either regularly or 'once-in-a-while'. May each and every one of you enjoy a healthy, happy, and ultimately heavenly 2013!

Halloween Questions!

SamuraiFrog answered these questions, so I figured I would, too...although, Halloween is the one holiday that I always think that I should get into more than I actually do. I'm not sure why that is...maybe it's because I'm too busy grooving on how happy I am that it's fall and my favorite month to really indulge my enjoyment of scary stuff. Not sure...but anyway, the questions!

(1) What's your favorite Halloween costume ever?

In all honesty, I only remember a single Halloween costume...but it was pretty awesome. My favorite superhero as a small child was Captain Marvel (SHAZAM!!!), so my mother hand-made me a Captain Marvel suit. It was amazing...and I think she might still have it stashed someplace at the Original Casa Jaquandor. I wore it in Kindergarten and in 1st grade, which was the last time I ever trick-or-treated. (In second grade I think the town we lived in discouraged the practice, in third and fourth grade I decided it was more fun to just hand out candy, and after that, we moved to a place that wasn't really in a 'neighborhood', per se.)

The Daughter has had a bunch of nifty ones, such as Swiftheart Rabbit (one of the non-bear Care Bears, and as a vampire queen, both hand-made by The Wife).

(2) What's your favorite Halloween candy (or other treat)?

I know so few people who love candy corn, and yet it's everywhere in October...and I love it! So there! And malted milk balls are great...but every year I'd forget the difference between them and Milk Duds, which are EVIL. Popcorn balls were nifty -- still are, I suppose. And Almond Joy, huzzah!

(3) Name the scariest book you've ever read?

Steven King's IT was pretty disturbing. But for giving me the heebie-jeebies as I read it, nothing's ever matched my first reading of John Bellairs's The Letter, the Witch, and the Ring. I was eleven or twelve, and there are some very creepy scenes in that book. Now, it's a Young Adult book and by today's standards it's pretty tame stuff. But I've never since read anything that had me wanting quite as bad to sleep with all the lights on.

(4) Who's the best movie vampire ever:
(a) Bela Lugosi
(b) George Hamilton
(c) Tom Cruise
(d) Robert Pattinson

I've got to agree with SamuraiFrog on this -- the fact that Pattinson is on the list (they're not even vampires, folks!) instead of Christopher Lee is pretty dispiriting. And I liked Gary Oldman, too.

(5) Who'd win in a fist fight? Sookie or Bella?

OK, this is dumb. I don't even know who Sookie is.

(6) Are you superstitious? How?

Nope.

(7) Frankenberry, Count Chocula, or Boo Berry?

Here's something you didn't know: I've never had any of these. I'm just not that into the sugary cereals. If I want a sweet cereal, I'll go for Golden Grahams every time. (I've been in the mood to revisit Honeycomb for the first time in 30 years, though, and compare notes with my memory....)

(8) Will you dress up this year? If so, as what?

Highly unlikely that I will. The Store encourages dressing up on the Saturday before Halloween, but I don't work Saturdays. Nor do I get invited to dress-up Halloween parties (and that's not a complaint!), so I don't have a whole lot of opportunities. I'll spend it like always: in overalls. (Which, funnily enough, end up being a component of a lot of costumes for others!)

A Quiz thing

Here's a set of interesting questions that Lynn posted, and as usual, I cannot resist!

Q: If something is forbidden, do you want it less or more?

I think that one thing that differentiates 'adulthood', or 'maturity', or whatever you want to call it, is the ability to understand why things are sometimes forbidden. Forbidden things tend to have less of the quality of, say, me at six years old being 'forbidden' to go into my sister's room -- you bet your ass that made me want to go in there at every opportunity!

But nowadays, when I'm told "You are forbidden to attempt to fix this piece of equipment!" (just to make up an example), I know that it's generally because (a) I'm not qualified and (b) there's a million volts going through it.

Q: Is there an area of your life where you feel out of control? Especially in control?

I have control of my writing. I don't have control over whether it goes anywhere, but the words themselves, the ones that I choose to depict what happens to my characters? That's all me!

As for being out of control? The economy at large, I suppose. The environment. The state of the world. I have precious little control over any of that, so I try not to worry about it.

Q: If you unexpectedly had a completely free afternoon, what would you do with that time?

When's the afternoon? Mid-summer? Fall? Winter? Is there a movie just out that I want to see? Or do I want to get some coffee and do some writing? Or go walk in the woods and take pictures?

Q: Are you comfortable or uncomfortable in a disorderly environment?

A mix of both, I suppose. I know, weak answer...but I think that order is generally agreeable because it makes life easier. I get uncomfortable when order becomes a goal in itself, though.

Q: How much time do you spend looking for things you can’t find?

Again, depends on what it is. Wallet? Car keys? Glasses? Those I look for a lot. A certain book that I know I own? I'll look a bit, and then figure it'll turn up later on. (Or I'll remember that I don't even own it. Yes, that's happened.)

Q: Are you motivated by competition?

Not that much, except for playing games or whatnot. Competition in life annoys me, and I hate approaching life that way or assuming that I need to. Again it goes back to things I can control, and really, the only thing I can control is my own efforts. I tend to think that the only competition I'm generally in is with myself.

Q: Do you find it easier to do things for other people than to do things for yourself?

Oh, yes. Yes indeed.

Q: Do you work constantly? or think you should be working?

Yes to the second. I live in constant fear that I'm not getting enough done. I look at my writing-tracking spreadsheet and I see that I'm consistently clearing my own quota, and I wonder if I shouldn't double it. But I don't want to set the goal so high that I'm spending time worrying about making that goal and not about other goals, like spending time interacting with the Family Unit.

Q: Do you embrace rules or flout rules?

It goes back to my answer to the 'forbidden things' question: if I know why the rule exists, I'm much more likely to follow it than if it just seems to be a rule created because that's the way someone at a desk decided that things should be done.

But what about 'writing' rules? Most of those tend to be guidelines more than rules, but some that I think are really important to my personal productivity: Show, don't tell; only rarely use anything other than 'said' as my verb of dialog attribution; adverbs are The Devil; and most importantly, Nulla dies sine linea: "Never a day without lines".

Q: Do you work well under pressure?

Sometimes. Once I get the job going, I'm fine...but I do have a tendency to start trying to work a little too fast and then bad things happen. If I force myself to take my time and do the job I know how to do, I'm fine.

Q: What would your perfect day look like?

I'd get some writing done. I'd go for a walk. I'd drink some coffee in the morning and some rum in the evening. I'd talk to The Wife. I'd read. I'd wear overalls and I'd take a brief nap at some point.

Q: How much TV do you watch in a week (include computer time spent watching videos, movies, YouTube)?

Three hours a day? Maybe? It varies, and I tend to do some stuff while those shows are on, anyway. And you know what? I'm fine with that. I pick good stuff to watch, and there's a LOT of good stuff to watch these days. I don't feel that the time I do spend watching something is time I'm wasting.

Q: Are you a morning person or a night person?

Heh! My standard answer here is that I'm by temperament a night person who has been forced by certain aspects of life (such as the day job's start time) to become a morning person. I tend to not get enough sleep during the week because of this. That may be my most unhealthy habit, actually.

Q: What’s more satisfying to you: saving time or saving money?

Again, it depends! But I tend to bias toward time. I know folks who rigorously sift through coupons and grocery store ads to determine which local store is cheapest any given week on various items they plan to buy, and then they'll spend a day going to three or more stores to buy it all. That would drive me crazy. I'd much rather shop in one place, maybe spend ten more bucks than I would otherwise, and have my shopping done in an hour.

Q: Do you like to be in the spotlight?

I do, but I don't like to seek it much. This blog (and other social networking mechanisms) are as extroverted as I tend to get. Now, if someone shines a spotlight on me, I'm not recoiling in horror. But I don't knock myself out to get it.

Q: Is your life “on hold” in any aspect? Until you finish your thesis, get married, lose weight?

Not 'on hold', but...well, let's just say that apartment living is losing its cachet....

Q: What would you do if you had more energy?

More of what I already do. In fact, my main hang-up isn't energy; for me, it's time. I don't feel I have enough to devote to the things I truly love doing already!

Q: If you suddenly had an extra room in your house, what would you do with it?

Fill it with books? Or set up a woodworking/carpentry shop? Hmmmm....

Q: What people and activities energize you? Make you feel depleted?

Going to new places, new cities; walking museums and used bookstores. Walking outside. Depleted? I hate it when I'm forced into social situations where I'm 'required' to get to know people. I'm not terribly extroverted, until I get to know people.

Q: Is it hard for you to get rid of things that you no longer need or want?

Sometimes, if I can come up with a sentimental reason for it. But I'm gradually becoming more hard-nosed about stuff like this. My problem is getting motivated to go through and get rid of stuff to begin with.

(The exception here, of course, is books. I have the hardest time getting rid of books!)

Q: Do you get frustrated easily?

Yeah, I do. Not something I like about myself! I hate it when I know I'm doing something right and it's still not coming out right.

Q: On a typical night, what time do you go to bed? How many hours of sleep do you get?

Usually midnight or so. Weekdays I'm up at 6:00 am, unless I'm not working, in which case I'm either sleeping in or I'm up when The Daughter gets up (not much later than that, sad to say). If I have an early morning job to do, I'll get up shortly before 4:00 am. Currently I use the 6:00 to 7:00 hour to do a little online reading and such and then for writing. Writing every day really keeps the pump primed, and having a dedicated time each day when I write is really a good idea.

Q: If at the end of the year, you had accomplished one thing, what is the one accomplishment that would make the biggest difference to your happiness?

I'd love to sell a manuscript! But as I'm going to be starting editing this week, I'd like to at least have it submitted somewhere by year's end. I'd also like to have the first draft done on Lighthouse Boy (not the actual title), but I'm not sure I'll make it, as I'm not entirely sure how long this one's going to be. I'm not sure if I should try to stick to my 180000 word goal, or allow myself more than that. As I currently have no idea where the story is going...I'm leaving this up in the air.

Q: And here’s another question for you. What questions would you add to this list, to help other people know themselves better? It’s so important, and so elusive.

Like Lynn: no book questions! I'm a firm believer that looking at someone's bookshelf tells me a great deal about them. And maybe questions about vocations and the choosing thereof...not all of us get to choose our vocations, but are chosen for them, and of the latter group, a lucky bunch do find some value in them after all. If that makes sense.

Anyway...there's the quiz!

A quiz-thing

I haven't done one of these in quite some time! Roger did this one, and I think I will, too.

1. One of my favorite TV shows recently changed the actors who played two characters. Have you ever been bothered by a TV show or movie series changing actors who play a character you love?

At first glance, I didn't think I really had very many good examples of this, but thinking about it more, it's obvious that I have a bunch. First we have the James Bond movies; you can't be a long-time Bond fan and not have some strong opinions as to which one's the best. (Mine is that I really, truly, honestly like every single Bond actor, and that the one most generally viewed as the worst -- George Lazenby -- was not only pretty good, but starred in the best Bond film ever made. How do you like that!)

Then we have things like the ongoing reboot of Star Trek, with younger actors cast as Captain Kirk and company, and there's the new version of Spider Man coming out soon. I'm fine with Trek, although I'm not as thrilled with the resulting movie as some and I think the goofy "But it's just a new timeline!" excuses are pretty weak; I'm not fine with Spider-Man, though, because it's unnecessary when a perfectly acceptable (even if most folks didn't like III all that much) series of films could have been continued, and the only reason this one's happening at all is because Sony has to make a movie or they lose the Spider-Man rights.

I also remember things like the year that Donna Reed played Miss Ellie on Dallas, because they didn't want to write out Miss Ellie but Barbara Bel Geddes needed time off. I was OK with that; by that point, Miss Ellie was mainly a supporting character, anyway.

So basically, I go with a case-by-case basis on this kind of thing.

2. A coworker recently shared a link to a blog listing the "five things you should know before dating a journalist." As a journalist, I can honestly say the writer was spot-on. What are some things people should know before spending time with you?

I'm kind of confoozled by this question...if they want to spend time with me then they gotta know something about me to begin with, right? But anyway, I guess people should know that I tend to value honest conversation and laughter, and that I find racism and paranoia a major turnoff. Singing the praises of the New England Patriots is right out.

3. What is something you often do without realizing that you're doing it?


Knuckle-cracking. Humming. Muttering to myself. Staring off into space because I'm thinking about something.

4. Who has the capacity to make you angrier than anyone else in your life, and what in particular does he or she do to make you so angry?

Yeesh, I don't know...various Republicans, maybe? I can feel anger pretty intensely, but it burns itself out pretty quickly. The whole Tea Party thing makes me pretty mad, though. So do young people who bleat about Ron Paul and how awesome it would be if we hitched our 21st-century economy to 19th-century economic theory; what irritates me is how intensely clueless these folks are, and yet they'll tell me, "Educate yourself!" And climate-change deniers strikes me as not just angering, but downright dangerous.

5. If a fairy waved a magic wand and gave you the house of your dreams, where would it be and what features would it have?


A large kitchen with really great ventilation, large bedrooms, a room big enough for the books (and with enough shelves), and it should be on a nice-sized lot bounded by a bunch of trees, for cooling and privacy. Oh, and a woodstove, and an outbuilding of some sort -- maybe an old, ramshackle garage -- where I could set up some kind of workshop so I could finally start exploring woodworking on a real basis and not just piecemeal via the projects I get at The Store.

6. What’s a belief that you hold with which many people disagree?

Obviously, that the Star Wars prequels don't suck! And also, that Super Bowl commercials are generally lame and not interesting enough to bother watching. I pay so little attention that there could be an ad during a Super Bowl featuring Kat Dennings wearing overalls while engaging in a pie fight, and I wouldn't know until the next day. (And maybe a good thing...that scenario might well make my head explode.)

7. I used to talk in my sleep. In fact, I could carry on a conversation with someone when I was fully asleep, and my mom used this fact when I was a teenager to find out if I did anything wrong and was hiding it from my parents. If you were talking your sleep tonight, what do you think you would say?

"Cersei, you lying whore." (I'm reading A Clash of Kings right now.)

8. The fourth installment of the "Twilight" movie series ("Breaking Dawn Part I") will be released in theaters soon. Movie theaters started selling advance tickets for midnight showings months ago. Have you ever attended a midnight premiere showing of a movie?

Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith. Those are the only midnight movies I've done. I've seen a host of others on opening day, though.

9. On Tuesday, tigers, lions and bears were let loose in Zanesville, Ohio, by their owner before he committed suicide, leading to a hunt in which 49 of the animals, including 18 endangered Bengal tigers, were killed. How would you react if you saw "Caution exotic animals. Stay in your vehicle" being displayed on a road sign?

OK, this quiz is officially dated now. If I'm in the car with a person I don't like, maybe I distract them so they don't see the sign and then trick them into getting outside? No, that's mean. I guess I just drive away until I figure I'm safe and then call someone to find out what's going on.

10. If a company opened a theme park aimed at adults, what would you name one of the rides?


The Princess Leia Organa Slave Girl Revue. This would take place at the Star Wars theme park. Which needs to exist.

11. Imagine you just moved onto Sesame Street. Which puppet would you want as your new roommate?


Since Kermit exists on both Sesame Street and The Muppet Show, I will assume that Sesame Street is somewhat close to whatever street the Muppet Theater is on. This, therefore, gives me access to all the Muppets, and not just the ones on Sesame Street. For a roommate? I'd take Scooter. I think he'd be fairly quiet and conscientious. (I'll bet Animal throws some wild parties....)

12. Have you ever had a weird crush on a famous person that didn't make sense to you?


Nah, they all make sense to me. Some of them may not make sense to you, but I can't help that!

13. If you get ten minutes to interview any celebrity of your choice, who would you like it to be?


George Lucas. Or Barack Obama. Or Joss Whedon. Or...I'll just stop there, I guess.

14. You've just won the complete DVD collection of all the movies starring one actor or actress. Which actor/actress would you pick?


Ooooh, tough one. I think I'd go with Humphrey Bogart. Or Meryl Streep. Or Marilyn Monroe. Or...yeah, I'll stop there.

15. Actor George Clooney recently told People Magazine that he doesn't use Twitter "because I will drink in the evening and I don't want anything that I could possibly write at midnight to actually end my career." What is something you've said through social media and then regretted it?


A Facebook friend posted that he was going off to work as a polling place volunteer on either Election Day or Primary Day, and I posted something like "Good luck, and make sure you demand ID and do whatever you need to do to keep those pesky brown people from voting!" He's pretty liberal, so I figured he and his friends would recognize that I was mocking the GOP's jihad against 'voter fraud', none of which actually exists and which really gives rise to policies that just happen to also heavily discourage minority voters, who tend to vote for Democrats. My phrasing, though was not well-considered or well-received, so I apologized and deleted the comment. Not my finest moment online.

16. VH1 has re-introduced its hit show "Pop-Up Video," which gives behind-the-scenes facts for popular music videos. What musician would you be most interested in learning behind-the-scenes facts about?


John Williams. Or the Beatles.

17. If you stumbled across someone's personal written journal that was accidentally left in a public place, would you read any of the content?


That's tough...I think I'd thumb through it, in the hopes of seeing if I could find any identifying marks within it, so that I might try to contact the owner and return it to them. If it was completely anonymous, though...maybe I'd read it. I'm honestly not sure.

18. What is the title of a self-help book that you'd never want to see on a store bookshelf?

Finding the Super Model In Your Life, by Tom Brady.

19. Many media outlets have been asking this question a lot this week... Which Halloween costume do you think will be overdone this year?

Well, obviously this quiz has been knocking around for a few months. Right now I have no idea...but the idea of a bunch of kids dressed up as Mitt Romney is pretty unsettling.

20. Should a marriage license have a renewal date or expiration date, like a driver’s license?

Ye Gods, why would we want to do this? Is someone seriously suggesting this? As in, you have to renew by a certain date or your marriage simply ends? Is this an actual idea out there somewhere? It seems to me that this, far more than allowing gays to marry, would fundamentally alter the notion of what marriage is about.

And there, the quiz ends. Huzzah!

2011: The year of the doldrums

This quiz is my traditional sign-off to a calendar year. 2011 was not a bad year, nor was it a great one. I didn't make any great strides, but nothing cataclysmic happened either. This isn't a complaint; I get the feeling that 2011 was a giant bowl of suck for a whole lot of people, and I am grateful that I wasn't one of them. I hope that this year was more of a "just keep stacking the bricks one by one" kind of year, and that when I'm finished with all that brick-stacking, hey look, I've built the Great Wall of China. (That metaphor worked a lot better in my head, it must be admitted.)

So anyway, here are the questions that run down the year!

Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

As always, some yes, some no. I haven't made any great professional strides, either writing or at The Store, but I've gotten better at each, and I have a project (Princesses in SPACE!!!, not the actual title) that's humming along nicely. And I did get healthier. So yay, me!

As for next year, the usual: write more, read more, exercise more, watch more movies. On the reading front, I'll be participating in a Classics Challenge in 2012. If anyone wants to join, info is there!

Did anyone close to you give birth?

My sister-in-law had Child Unit Number Two. Other than that...nope. Just a few online friends and acquaintances.

Did anyone close to you die?

No.

What countries did you visit?

Never left the USA. We hope to go to Canada again next year sometime, but we haven't left the USA in years. In my mind, though, I visited the Shire, Rohan, Gondor, and so on. As well as a whole bunch of planets. I spent a lot of time on a planet called Xonareth, but I can't say more about that just yet.

What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?

A book with my name on it. I don't know if that'll be feasible, though...I'm still working on the first draft and am maybe two-thirds of the way through it. Then it's time to edit it, generate the second draft, and proceed from there.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Moderate weight loss; getting started on Princesses In SPACE!!! (not the actual title).

What was your biggest failure?

I'm not sure if I'm ever going to return to The Promised King. The story still stays in my head, though, so...maybe.

What was the best thing you bought?

The Wife's Kindle Fire; she is utterly entranced by the thing. Quite a few books. Two pairs of Carhartt overalls (a painter's pair and a black "duck" pair).

Whose behavior merited celebration?

The Wife and Daughter, as always!

The "Occupy" folks. I question the efficacy of continued camping out in city squares, but I do not question the ideals of the movement, and I deeply hope that our country may finally, at long long long long last, be turning away from its decades-long unquestioned commitment to allowing money to flow straight to the top of society in the hopes that, when they finally fall down to our level, those table scraps are just awesome, man.

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

The Republican presidential candidates. Seriously, watching these people desperately try to outclaw each other in an effort to prove to the Tea Partiers which one is the stupidest is one of the most depressing things I've ever seen. Just watching all of these people deny evolution, global warming, and other things, all the while continuing to insist that if we just cut all the taxes on rich people prosperity will return and the streets will flow with milk and honey makes me sick to my stomach.

Where did most of your money go?

Food, bills, books.

What did you get really excited about?

We took a trip to Pittsburgh as a family in the spring, and a trip to the Jersey Shore in the summer. The Wife and I had our annual fall getaway. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 and The Muppets came out. I resumed exercise and weight training (fallen off the wagon a little bit during the holidays). I turned 40 (less excited about that one, maybe...although the pies were nice).

What song will always remind you of 2011?

In honor of the Occupy movement, the song that I believe should be our National Anthem (all due respect to "The Star Spangled Banner"):




(The fact that George Lucas shows up in the middle of the crowd in this video is just gravy.)

Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder?

Happier. But it's touchy, so don't piss me off, people!

(I kid, folks. I kid because I love.)

Thinner or fatter?

Thinner! Not by a whole lot, but thinner. A little bit at a time, folks. If you're gonna build the Wall of China one brick at a time, you're gonna take it apart one brick at a time, too.

Richer or poorer?

About the same...but on better grounding.

What do you wish you'd done more of?

Writing! And reading. And listening to music. And watching movies.

What do you wish you'd done less of?

Eating, I suppose. And I should probably stop throwing rocks at libertarians, Ayn Rand ideologues, and Ron Paul supporters. I just can't help myself sometimes.

How did you spend Christmas?

Eating, opening gifts, going to church, driving around to look at lights, visiting Little Quinn at his grave, all the usual stuff.

Did you fall in love in 2010?

As always: I fall in love on a daily basis!

How many one-night stands?

Zero. I'm off the market, folks.

What was your favorite TV program?

Castle, The Big Bang Theory, Person of Interest (really liking this one so far), Pawn Stars (discovered on Netflix, post forthcoming), and all the old ones...Firefly, Star Trek, The X-Files. I want to watch Farscape and maybe Battlestar Galactica in the new year.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

I don't do hate. And Osama Bin Laden is dead as old Marley, which I think is a Good Thing.

What was the best book you read?

A Tale of Two Cities. That book just made me a-quiver.

What was your greatest musical discovery?

Not a major year for musical discoveries, I'm sorry to say. Maybe I should try and discover some more music one of these years.

What did you want and get?

Books, movies, pizza, trying the new Japanese steakhouse, larger pans for Chicago deep-dish pizza, tickets to Wicked, tickets to Les Miz (it plays here in March 2012, but I've got the tickets already), new hand tools, a laminate trimmer, a new (to me) car, time with The Wife, new overalls, and pies in my face.

What did you want and not get?

A Dewalt compact router; an oscillating tool; an impact driver. A new laptop (although the old one's not dead yet, and I'm loath to replace things like laptops before they die completely or become virtually unusable).

What were your favorite films of this year?

This is always tough, since I rarely see movies in the year they come out anymore. Harry Potter and The Muppets are probably tops. I haven't blogged them yet, but I loved Space Battleship Yamato and Inglourious Basterds.

What did you do on your birthday?

Our annual trip to Ithaca, NY for the Apple Harvest Festival, which is always a wonderful time. More on the birthday celebration here.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?

Huh...I haven't changed my personal fashion concept in years. Maybe I should...but nah. It's workwear-chic for the long haul!

What kept you sane?

Same reply as last year: Laughing; reading; writing; discovering that even though we've been together in one way or another for almost twenty twenty-one years, I still have ways of getting to know The Wife; singing loudly in the car when I'm by myself; torturing The Daughter with awful puns (something my father did to me, coincidentally enough!); geeking out to Star Wars and Lord of the Rings. And take it from me: if you ever feel that maybe you're taking yourself too seriously, have your spouse or significant other hit you with a pie. It's awfully hard to take yourself seriously when your face is dripping whipped cream and coconut custard.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Stana Katic. Melissa Rauch. Lisa Edelstein. Hugh Laurie. Jeff Probst. Nathan Fillion. Barack Obama. Jon Stewart. And my newest love...Kat Dennings! Welcome aboard, Kat! (Hmmm...that sounded creepier than intended....)

What political issue stirred you the most?

The arrival on the scene of the Occupy movement thrilled me deeply. I hope now that it can move beyond protests and find a way to actually start to influence policy. This country needs to move to the left.

Who did you miss?

Most of the people who used to read this blog! Where'd you all go?

Who was the best new person you met?

The "Saturday Centus" folks are a wonderful bunch of eccentrics, weirdos, and scoundrels. I love 'em all, every one!

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010:

In a way it's deeply liberating to realize just how little people actually think of you. And not "how little they think" as in, they think poorly of you, but rather how little they think, as in, "Oh, I forgot all about that guy!"

And keeping the ones from years past: We learn by screwing up, so embrace your inner FAIL! The Internet is made of people. Punting is for losers. Democracy works, eventually. Not all tears are an evil. Whipped cream is a miracle substance. So is ice cream. Use your library; limiting your reading to only those books you can afford to buy is madness. OpenOffice rules. Buy good tools, take care of them, don't lend them out, and they'll last forever. Pie is wonderful stuff, whether on your plate or in your face. Screw fashion; if it's comfy, wear it. We're not meant to be alone. No object fits in your hand so perfectly as your wife's hand, and no object fits so perfectly on your shoulder as your child's head. Let it be, and all you need is love.

And keep smiling, because you never know what life will throw in your face next!

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

In a year which saw the pop-cultural return of the Muppets, and for a person like me who tries to spend as much time as possible in a dream state because the dreams are so much better than the reality, this song is the perfect summation of this year.




Why are there so many songs about rainbows
And what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
And rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
The Lovers, the Dreamers, and Me.

Who said that every wish would be heard and answered
when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that and someone believed it,
and look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us stargazing?
And what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
the Lovers, the Dreamers, and Me.

All of us under its spell,
we know that it's probably magic....

Have you been half asleep, and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that calls the young sailors?
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
the Lovers, the Dreamers, and Me!

To all the Lover and Dreamers out there, may 2012 be well and truly blessed!


(Regular blogging will resume on Monday, January 2.)