Thursday, December 07, 2006


OK, I know for a fact that there are lots of smart people who live in Texas, so I don't want to make fun of the place. But sometimes they make it so damned hard:

A plan to build a mosque in this Houston suburb has triggered a neighborhood dispute, with community members warning the place will become a terrorist hotbed and one man threatening to hold pig races on Fridays just to offend the Muslims.

This story was so surreal that I had to read it several times just to grasp the particulars. It seems that an Islamic organization wants to build a mosque in a town called Katy, Texas (which is apparently in the Houston region), and they bought some land to do just that. Cue the histrionics from people who have nothing against Moslems, but are concerned about "property values, traffic, and drainage" -- in short, the usual stuff people worry about when undesirable things want to move in. I wonder how much they'd worry about those things if it was one of those gigantic Christian megachurches, the ones that seat more people than some NHL venues, that was looking to build there. I bet they wouldn't think there'd be drainage problems then! But then, there wouldn't be terrorists either, because wherever Muslims congregate, there's sure to be some terrorizin'!

And then there's the guy who plans to race pigs next door to the new mosque, just to offend the Muslims. First of all, it seems that this guy originally thought that the new mosque meant he'd have to give up the land he already owned, which turned out to be his own mistake, but no matter -- he's gonna run his pigs anyway!

Though he now concedes the Muslims are probably not after his land, Baker said he is obligated to go through with the pig races, probably within the next few weeks, because "I would be like a total idiot if I didn’t. I'd be the laughingstock now because I’ve gone too far."

See what happens? You get yourself in so deep, and then you promise people some pig racin', so how are you gonna look if you don't follow through? You'll look like an idiot! Because that's what makes you look stupid -- not overreacting to a mistake you yourself made in the first place. That doesn't make you look stupid at all!

Let's face things here, dude: you look like an idiot and a laughingstock already. Racing the pigs is just going to be the icing on the Stupid Cake -- especially since, as the article notes, Muslims don't worship pigs or anything, they merely refrain from eating pork. Pigs are not to Islam as cows are to Hinduism, a distinction that I'm sure will be lost on the pig-farmer. After all, he's got to strike his blow against the Coming of the Caliphate, just after he slops old Wilbur.


Anonymous said...

Texas isn't as knee-jerk redneck fascist as much of the rest of the country believes, but it's folks like this nincompoop that really make me wonder sometimes.

Mr. Baker, here's a clue-by-four upside the head: You already ARE a laughingstock, pig races or no.

Belladonna said...

I didn't know whether to laugh or weep as I read this. The intolerance and stupid stereotyping that goes on in this world never ceases to amaze me.

Anonymous said...

i had lunch today with friend that lives in Katy. he asked me if i had heard of the pig races - i hadn't. though i live in houston my life is more focused on global issues rather than the 'hatfields and mccoys'. i have worked in muslim countries...have many friends that are muslims...and my reaction was predictable - i shook my head. my friend then continued - he said his son's girl friend's father is the sponsor of the pig races. suddenly this got more relevant. he said...that the he was being pressured to sell his land to them. he declined. the second time he was approached the offer was wrapped with a threat. once again, he declined. i don't condone the pig races and this comment is as good as my faith in hearing a good friend discuss the issue. so what is real? not sure. intolerance is a bad thing...very bad. just look at what is happening in the netherlands these the book...murder in will open your eyes. it will make you ask questions. in can bring good faith to the table and try to be a good global citizen but the truth be known the world has a lot of players that play ugly...too bad that is the case. stereotyping, intolerance, bias, bigotry, etc is all ugly stuff.