What's on the Tee-Vee

John and Roger did it, and since they're always stealing my goofy meme-stuff, I figure I should return the favor. Here's what I plan to watch on TV this season. (I end up taping a lot of shows for The Wife, who works when they're on, and then we watch them later whenever an opportunity arises.)

Monday Night:

8:00: Deal or No Deal. The Daughter likes this show; I mainly do computer stuff or read while it's on. If it's not on at all, I may watch Antiques Roadshow.

9:00: Nothing. That's usually bed time, so I'm reading to the Daughter and doing whatever afterwards. I might leave the CBS sitcom lineup on; that Charlie Sheen show is usually good for a laugh or two, but I can take it or leave it. (Isn't this to be the Heroes timeslot? I may give that a try.)

10:00: CSI: Miami. I was discussing this show at work today, actually -- David Caruso's acting is absolutely absurd, but it's either absurd in a way that you love it or in a way that you hate it. I, personally, love it -- he's the heir-apparent to the William Shatner school of emotive line delivery, where it's as if every syllable he utters is part of a soliloquy, no matter whether he's on screen with anyone else or not. When my interlocutor pointed out that Shatner's got some respect lately and has long since realized he's very spoofable, I decided that Caruso is Shatner circa 1982 or so. Caruso is now enjoying his TJ Hooker phase.

Case in point: For reasons too involved to go into in depth, this season's premiere of CSI: Miami took place in Rio de Janeiro. The opening scene had Caruso's character, Horatio Caine, striking his uber-dramatic Carusonic pose in front of that giant statue of Jesus that overlooks Rio from a mountaintop. Was there evidence of some sort up there? Was that statue's base a crime scene? Nope. It had no relevance at all to the story. Someone with the show simply decided that they couldn't film in Rio without having Caruso act all Carusonic in front of the giant Jesus statue. It was awesome, let me tell you.

(And when Caruso's not on the screen, there's a good chance that Emily Procter is. So I still win!)

Tuesday Night:

8:00: House. (Or Nova, if it's interesting and House isn't on.) I like House a good deal, although I do think they need to start shaking up the format a bit; the way it is now, you know that the main medical mystery won't be resolved at all until about 8:50.

9:00 - 11:00: Gee, nothing, really. Tuesday's a wasteland, although that will change in January when American Idol returns. (Also if Scrubs is still on Tuesdays when it gets back.)

Wednesday Night:

8:00 - 10:00: Again, nothing as of yet, although Jericho sounds interesting, so I may give that a whirl.

10:00: CSI: NY. My least favorite CSI show, really. I tend to read while it's on. Might give The Nine a try; might not.

Thursday Night:

8:00: My Name is Earl, followed by The Office. I'll watch these two shows in reruns, even.

9:00: CSI. Still the best of the CSIs, with the best characters and the most dark humor.

10:00: Gray's Anatomy, which I taped an hour before whilst watching CSI. I'm frankly a bit tired of the whole "Meredith and Dr. McDreamy" subplot, but I still like this show. ER died for good in my mind last year, although it limped along for The Wife. But then she finally lost patience too when they did yet another "Send some character to Africa" story that was just like all the other "Send some character to Africa" stories, and then the worst cliffhanger episode on a network drama since Dynasty's "Moldavian Wedding Massacre". And since I recently saw that the show's idea-dry producers are bringing Sally Field back yet again, we're both done. I doubt we'll even watch the season opener to see if Nurse Sam and her brat kid finally die horribly. In its heyday, one of the best shows on TV ever. Now, a total embarrassment.

Friday Night:

8:00 - 11:00: Nothing at all. If The Wife is off, this will be catch-up-on-stuff-on-tape night; otherwise, it'll be movie night. (Although I may give this Men in Trees show a try, if it sticks around at all.)

Saturday Night:

8:00 - 11:00: Again, nothing at all. I don't much care about college football. This will be another movie night or taped-shows night, unless something else that I like ends up in a Saturday time slot. But even then I might not care enough to follow a show to Saturday night, which can even become a "no TV of any kind" night on occasion in our home. Seriously: at 6:00 pm, NPR here has Thistle and Shamrock on until 8:00, when Marian McPartland's wonderful Piano Jazz takes over. But starting at 10:00, I can indulge a wonderful two hours of comedy: our local FOX affiliate has back-to-back Simpsons eps then, followed by the local PBS station at 11:00, with Monty Python's Flying Circus.

Sunday Night:

1:00 pm: The Buffalo Bills, or playoff football after the regular season ends.
7:00 pm: America's Funniest Home Videos. Yeah, yeah. Another show the Daughter gets to pick.
8:00 pm: Whatever's on until The Amazing Race starts around 8:30. Best reality show of them all; I'm kicking myself for missing the first seven or so seasons.
10:00: Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, courtesy of the good folks of Toronto. Will the show have legs? Who knows?

So that's it. I have to admit that more and more I'm thinking, "Screw the original telecasts of shows -- I'll watch them on DVD when they come out." I like immersing myself in a show's world for multiple episodes at a time; especially with shows that have ongoing arcs or storylines.