Elen sila lumenn omentielvo!

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Saturday Centus

[EDITED 9-18-11 to add a clarification, below.]

Wow, I'm actually on schedule this week! My initial reaction to this week's prompt was "Oh, crap," because we're supposed to take the prompt and work it into a bit of doggerel which can be sung to the tune of "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star". But then the idea came to me, so here it is:

In the autumn there's a flood
of folks with their bright red blood!
How I love to bite their necks,
Sometimes while they're having dinner*,
Vampires get to do it all,
When the summer turns to fall!

The problem here is that...well, I'm over the word limit, which Jenny set at 32 words plus the prompt. I'm at 37 here, but as far as I can tell, it does fit the tune just fine, so I'm going with it.

Oh and by the way, I was putridly** late with my last two entries, so go ahead and have a look if you so desire, here and here.

* Original rhyming word excised by virtue of this being a kinda-sorta family blog. Only not really. I just thought that would be funny to do.

CLARIFICATION: A reader has apparently badly misread what I wrote above, but I feel I should make absolutely clear that I am in no way disparaging the efforts of childrens' songwriters or the weekly Centus challenge. I am only disparaging my abilities as they pertain to childrens' songwriting (which are, not to put too fine a point on it, pretty much nonexistent.)

19 comments:

Nonna Beach said...

Excellent and very dark !
I knew it had to be you when I saw the title !!!

jfb57 said...

Oooo! Another clever take on the prompt. I may have to try & get my wedding anniversary into it as we got married in autumn! You've given me an idea!

There's a picture prompt here if you fancy it! http://jfb57.wordpress.com/2011/09/12/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week-10/

jabblog said...

What could you have written instead of dinner, I wonder?? ;-)

Judie said...

Ah, yes! Vlad the Impaler is again on the prowl! Excellent!!!!

5thsister said...

going against the grain and being unique, different, original, contrary, and whatever synonyms you can add!

I see your conundrum. Maybe the word snacks? Aw heck, we're all grown up here...go ahead, call it what it is.

Happier Than a Pig in Mud said...

Love it, especially with the rhyming word:@)

Cheryl said...

I like it but the rhythm is off with "dinner." A one syllable word would make it work. You'd still be over the limit but at least the song would flow more tightly.

Morning said...

fabulous...

Ames said...

I had a bit of difficulty too. But yours flows well!~Ames

Sue said...

My thoughts went in a similar direction. I like your style!

=)

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

Very nice, and noble of you to substitute "dinner" for "sex." I often do, as it's the more accessible option.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

PS oops, I meant substitute "sex" with "dinner." Sadly.

Deborah said...

Totally original, I loved it!

Viki said...

Very unique take on this but I liked it ;-) Good job!!

Dazee Dreamer said...

how cool are you to write it about vampires. love it.

Anna said...

Yes, yes, you are very clever.
But don't knock song-writing for children; it's not that easy. If you don't like the challenge, you don't have to mock people who take it seriously.

Anna

Anna's SC wk 72'In the Autumn'

Jaquandor said...

Cheryl: I chose that word precisely because it upset the rhythm, so it would stand out more.

Jaquandor said...

Anna: I'm not sure what on Earth made you think that I was mocking the challenge or insinuating that songwriting for children is an unworthy activity, because I was doing neither. My "oh, crap" reaction was because I am not very good at it, and my use of the word "doggerel" was because in a challenge like this, doggerel is what I'm likely to produce, again, because I'm not very good at this type of thing.

I took the approach I did on this prompt because that's the way my head works, not because I feel some disrespect for people whose heads work differently.

upinthecosmos said...

LOL, I like your take on it:-)